Friday, January 25, 2008

Two Posts Today - The Michigan Study & My RANT

The real post is below. This post just is pure venting. So, my apologies.

It's 7;30AM. My wife just walked into my study (the place where I work when I am not in the basement in my office). She pushed the guilt button about my daughter and her studies. The insinuation was, "She is not doing well because of . . . " I could sense where she was going and she was going to go to the place, "because maybe she has a learning disorder." This is the scapegoat policy of my wife. The "I am never taking responsibility for anything about anyone - including my own actions or inactions." It pisses me off. I told her, that, she needed to leave my office/study and I will take care of my daughter who has a test today. I will help her study, I said. It was not a pleasant exchange. It wasn't a blow up. But my reaction was direct. So much for detachment ladies and gentlemen. I, now, am pissed off. My apologies. My button was pushed. My button is blame and not taking responsibility to correct or address the real issue(s).

My wife won't take the time to study with her. She is "too busy." She does not work. Too busy doing what?! I cannot set a boundary on this one because my daughter suffers.

My wife could have been a contender [okay I stole this from the movie "On the Waterfront" - so sue me! ;-) ] She is smart. Attractive. Articulate. From a great family. But no responsibility. No accountability. What the hell happened? As the Talking Heads song goes, "Well, how did I get here?"

Ok - I am not pissed any more. But here is the important part of this blog post of this morning's RANT.

But if you have been watching the news this week, you have heard all over the news, that fighting couples live longer. Here is a couple of links in case you have been entombed the past two days (it's a slow news week -so it's all over the news)

1. From USA Today click here
2. From Fox News click here

So, with this news, that couples who fight live longer - I now know I am going to live to be 150!

One more thing Michigan . . .
. . . What you fail to report is this: that this life of fighting will provide a long life - but it will be a long life of misery.

Which one do you want? A life of happiness and normal life span? Or a longer life span marked by fighting?

I report. You decide. Thank you for letting me blow off some steam this morning.

5 comments:

Syd said...

I would rather not live a life of misery and refuse to do so. I also don't want to live a life in combat mode. It just isn't me. I detach and walk away or go to my sailboat. Having solitude and separate hobbies keeps my marriage intact.

Anonymous said...

We all want it all, but know that it is not reality. So, let's focus on the NOW, which can determine how good tomorrow can be!

kevinb

Joe said...

Yep. Sorry about that rant. I thought I could finish it off with a little humor. Problem was I reengaged. It went no where. I went for a run. Then called my sponsor who made me laugh and gave me two things to consider. He is a very wise man. He cut thru all my garbage and focused me on what I could solve, and also asking my Higher Power for some help on this specific issue. I forgot to ask HP ... I need to remember this in times where there are no answers.

Thanks
Joe

Joe said...

PS - I need a sailboat.

nanceelee said...

Yeah, then you and your daughter could go sailing together :-)