Saturday, December 13, 2008

You've Already Won

I read every morning. I find if I can concentrate on something positive without being sidetracked, I set sail for a more peaceful day.

Being Worthy And Deserving
Here what I read this morning.

If you cannot accept yourself - accept that you are worthy and deserving - then you cannot accept the behavior of other people and are therefore in judgment of them.

Wow. Not accepting myself as worthy and deserving sets me up as a judger of others [I know, "judger" no such thing - but it 6:40AM on Saturday!].

Here is another little sentence that caught my eye and my mind. I've read it a dozen times in the past 5 months;

If you are judging others and not accepting yourself as worthy, then you are dwelling on lack and limitation.

Scarcity Thinking Leads Me To Control or Fear Based Thinking
Okay. I get it. I am sitting on the negative, scarcity side of my mind and looking at life through a lens of poverty, lack and limitation; or things I don't have and then look for more - so I can set myself up for more scarcity, which essentially leads me to more fear based thinking.

Another sentence - right after the last one;

By dwelling on lack and limitation - you are limiting yourself and consequently making decisions that are based on fear. Your thinking goes; What will they think? What will they do? What will they say?

It's All ABout Me and My Thinking
YIKERS!!! I see it in me! I start by thinking scarcity. I take a slow step by step into obsessive NEGATIVE thinking - about things I cannot control. And then I might set myself up to try to control this behavior of others or things outside myself, which I cannot, and I know I cannot.

Recovery: Trading Control For Fear?
If I begin to recover, I stop the controlling behavior of myself over others. So, I begin to see that I stop trying to control. This is where I think I first recognized that when I stopped trying to control the behavior of others and the outcome I learned I was powerless. BUT and this is a BIG BUT - now I realize I cannot control - but now FEAR Comes In!!!!!

Recovery: The NEXT Step?
If I realize, I am already OKAY - I am already whole, complete and perfect (what I do is not perfect - but if I truly believe in a HP - my HP has allowed me the grace to be imperfect which makes me perfect. Does that make sense?].

No Longer Having To Win The Approval of Others
The mere fact that my HP has "allowed" me to live in this world and experience it first hand tells me I have already Won. I don't need to prove myself. I don't need the acceptance of others. I don't need to get the opinions of others to state I am okay and worthy. I am already worthy; therfore I have won. I no longer need to try to win the approval of others.

I need to print this post out. Tape it to the end of a stick. And then tape the other end of the stick to my head so I reread this everyday for the next 21 days.

Peace and serenity to all this weekend


Anonymous said...

I read your post and just got an image in my brain of a man walking around with a long stick taped to the top of his head and a piece of paper taped to the end of it. Made me laugh so hard!

I think that is a great idea except eventually we would all end up with a whole BOOK taped to the end of that stick!

I hear what you're saying about learning to no longer need the approval of others. How did we end up needing it in the first place? Did our parents teach us this? And how do we break that cycle and teach our children other people's opinion of them is not as important as what they think of themselves? I suppose awareness of the problem is the first step in solving it.

I remember what you put in a previous post about "what others think of me is none of my business." That really resonated with me and I think of it often. Thanks.


Syd said...

I sought approval because I thought that approval meant love. I would do anything to feel loved. It was learned early on. Now I realize that my HP loves me always. It's a good feeling in which I don't need to agree when I don't want to do something.

Anonymous said...

Your post just made be giggle out loud at work.

Just got into a program. I have an adult child who is an addict.

I know this is an old blog, are you still blogging?

I Love your blog, I have been reading it when I can, as I said I am at work .