Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Taking Action - My Affirmations

Al-Anon says; "Figuring it out, is not an Al-Anon slogan." However, doing nothing is not an Al-Anon slogan either. In Al-Anon we can confuse "turning it over to our HP" or "letting go" or "Live and Let Live" with "just sit there."

But this is not the case. You and I have to do the leg work. In our disease - and battling alcoholism - we become caught up in the fight which gives the alcoholism more power. To me it was like fighting the devil. It sounds weird, but in the middle of this craziness I became - well - friggin' crazy.

I thought about the disease and the craziness in my house and I cannot ever explain to anyone just how insane it was. I remembered this morning the insanity of worry, dread, hurt, aloneness, and suppressed anger.

When I started going to meetings and seeking help, I tried detaching. I in effect, tried to do nothing.

I have this thing now, where I am not working but perhaps 50% of what I used to work, because I have tried to "do nothing" more often. In fact, in many cases I do nothing more than I take action. It's almost like I am paralyzed. This is not necessarily a bad thing. Because I was usually doing something in the NOW - for something in the future. I therefore was not enjoying the NOW.

Now, I need to do more for the future. In fact I just built this PowerPoint presentation for a meeting next week. I had a few good ideas and I needed to capture them. I started to feel this rush that I need to obsess with doing more for the future. It is an old behavior that I am not sure I am ready to engage with again.

However, I know I need to take action on many things. I was never a procrastinator, but now I feel in some way I am procrastinating more. I feel lethargic more often than I used to. I feel too detached in some ways.

So here is a list of affirmations to help me focus on what to take action on, and what I should just leave alone. I hope this helps you.

Taking Action

  1. I act rather than not act on the things I know I have to do
  2. I write down what I need to do and then I review the list and I prioritize the list based upon: What is important to do right now. What is urgent but not important; What can be delegated or can wait until tomorrow. (Actually I have a much more defined system but this is enough for you right now)
  3. I work on only the important items right away.
  4. I review my list mid-day and at the end of the day to see progress and feel good about what was done.
  5. I focus all my energies on the task before me and waste no time thinking about the outcome. (this one was very new and foreign to me! I always thought about the outcome)
  6. When I focus on the task, I am achieve gratifying results.
  7. I know often spectacular results come only after I have pushed myself beyond where I thought I could go.
  8. I know like the marathon runner gets a "Second wind," I may find success is simply a matter of a little extra try.
  9. I know fear of failure is usually out of defensiveness, since we don't want people to laugh at us.
  10. I know I may avoid embarrassment by refusing to put myself into situations where failure might be a possible outcome.
  11. By depriving myself of a chance to fail, I deprive myself of a chance to succeed. I end up risking and doing nothing rather than risk anything at all.
  12. I know this puts me in perpetual limbo.
  13. I can gain valuable perspective on myself if I control my defensiveness.
  14. I know this means I make a habit of getting into uncomfortable situations and feelings and refuse to blame others for these.
  15. I know I am not the project, I am not a failure if the project fails.
  16. I always strive to do, and enjoy the doing, by staying focused on the action, like a mountain climber stays focused on each step he takes.

The next post will be about my favorite; "comparison."

Take care.


Syd said...

Yes, I know the lethargy that you speak of. For me, it has been like I'm in slow motion while I used to run on adrenalin. Things that were so important then, aren't as important now. I guess that this is what being in recovery has done. I am very detached and in the moment. But there has to be balance too. thanks for writing about this.

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