Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Affirmations & Feeling Good

In Al-Anon we are learning how to improve ourselves so that our situations improve. One tool that I find that has helped me tremendously in the past that I drifted away from, was the use of affirmations.

Affirmations are positive, present tense statements used in the first person. They are affirming what you want, what you want to become, how you want to behave. They are, to me at least, very centering. In the past I have taken a good book and rewrote it in a spiral bound notebook in the first person, present tense. I have - and this reveals my "weirdness" - rewritten Stephen Covey's books; "Seven Habits" and "Principled Centered Leadership;" also, Epictetus' book "A Manual For Living"; as well as Robert Anthony's "Beyond Positive Thinking."

In rewriting certain aspects of these books in the first person, present tense, positive - I become "uplifted" and receive a feeling of serenity. I drifted away from reading these rewritten affirmations - and I notice since I have done so - a little more static in my thinking. When I do read my affirmative books - I feel peace, calm and more serene, especially more serene throughout the day if I do this reading out loud - and I do mean out loud - and do it every day. It is amazing what this will do for you during the day - once you have found the book you may wish to rewrite. Because when your thoughts begin to stray, the voice of these affirmations that is now getting programmed into your head usually will pop up and help you get back on track, in very kind and gentle way.

I cannot explain it other than how I put it above.

Another good way to affirm, is to write out the behaviors and actions and thoughts you wish to carry around throughout the day.

Here are some examples;
I am happy, pleasant, and optimistic
I have an optimistic attitude to any situation
I know everything always works out positively
I am upbeat, positive and optimistic
I am very lucky because good things always happen to me
I can do anything I put my mind to
I am attracting good and positive people into my life
I am grateful for all I have and grateful for all I have become
I am excellent at time management
I write down everything that I need to do, before the day starts
I prioritize my most important things I need to do first, then I work only on the most important
I practice the principle of "Do it now" and this helps me avoid procrastination
I take action on my to do list.
At the end of each day, I look at my list and what I accomplished and transfer the things I haven't done to a new list.
Before I start any new task, I write it down, and review my list to see if this is the most important thing I have to do right now.
I always write things down and take good notes in meetings
I confirm with others who is responsible for what, and by when, so as to avoid confusion
I do only what I can do and I allow others to do what they can do.
I know mistakes are teachers to show me how to do something better the next time
I know life is a learning experience
I know I am separate from the project I am working on.
When situations are tense, I detach by thinking I am floating above the situation and looking down on it as a by-stander.
I look for the goodness in all people.
I return kindness for offense, compassion for anger, peacefulness and calm for crisis.
I hold my tongue, to get all the information first.

Maybe you get the picture - I hope you do.

Note, I do not say what I am avoiding. For example I do not say it negatively, like;
I do not drink coffee.

The "not" is cancelled out in the subconscious and is heard as; "I drink coffee."

Try affirmations - by writing out characteristics and behavior what you wish you wish to have. You can also affirm things you wish to have - that are realistic.

By writing these out AND by speaking them aloud you will see positive changes in your life AND most importantly gain a sense of self-control and self-centering which will help you to feel good about yourself.


Anonymous said...

Affirmations are a key ingredient of my day. Without them, I am lost.

Peace this Tuesday.


Syd said...

Affirmations are essential because we've beat ourselves up for so long. Have a great day Joe.

Anonymous said...

I just read this post after writing in my journal about how I can't seem to get myself to do the things at home that I want done. I ask myself if I'm just a lazy procrastinator. Why do I lack motivation at home but was so organized and put out so much at work.? You'd think I'm schizophrenic.

So I made my work list for the day then came in to read your post. It's incredibly uncanny how what you've written is so often what is going on with me.

Maybe this is a message to me to try using affirmations, practicing this daily, and retrain myself to be the effective person at home that I was in the working world.

Thanks Joe for the insight, again.

Anonymous said...

I love the daily affirmations given in Al-anon discussions. I have begun using them and I am really encouraged.