A Sign?

In my hometown, I was jogging and I came across this sign. I stopped in mid tracks, startled. And then I looked up laughing and said, "I got it. Okay, I got it!"

This was the day after I was affirming the same words in a notebook, in a three day management meeting. The VERY same words.

I just had to take this picture . . .

(The labels for this are interesting)

Everything will be OK

I am going to be Ok. New signage to follow. I am taking a break - but I shall return in August.

Good Thoughts

I have not posted in about 2 weeks. I took a mini-vacation. Today I am realizing how most everything I think about reverberates throughout the universe.

My life is what my thoughts have been.

Or said another way, "My life is due to what I think about."

If I change my thinking - remove any negative thinking - I can become happier, more positive and acheive serenity.

Today I am thinking good thoughts.

Happiness

From the same book - by Ari Kiev

A quote from Richard L Evans;

"May we never let the things we can't have, or don't have, or shouldn't have, spoil our enjoyment of the things we do have and can have. As we value our happiness let us not forget it, for one of the greatest lessons in life is learning to be happy without the things we cannot or should not have."

I would like to provide a different - modified version;

"May we never let the things we have done or haven't done, spoil our enjoyment of the things we are are doing. As we value our happiness let us not forget it, for one of the greatest lessons in life is learning to happy with what we are doing." [not what we have done wrong or done badly]

I would also add - ". . . don't allow the things we have done, keep us from doing what we could be doing."

My brain is so crazy - I beat myself up for stupid things I have done. I flog myself. I use self-perpetuated guilt. I am doing that now - I did some dumb things in the past few weeks.

I am catching myself - and I need to be gentle with myself - something I don't do very well.

I looked up this person - Evans. And this is what I found:

Richard L. Evans is best known for his inspirational messages given in the long-running weekly radio program "Music and the Spoken Word" with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. As a General Authority of the Mormon Church, he was one of their most senior leaders.

Evans became employed at KSL Radio in Salt Lake City as a staff announcer in 1930. This began his long association with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir, for he announced the titles of compositions and gave station identification for the broadcast of programs that included hymns and choral works backed by The Tabernacle Organ. In time he began to include some short thoughts associated with the musical selections. These were well received and soon evolved into non-denominational inspirational "sermonettes" usually less than two minutes, about moral principles, the inter-relationships of people, and the proper approach to life. His messages were ecumenical in nature, pointing out that the differences between people are not as great as what they have in common. [emphasis added - mine]

Other quotes:

• The undertaking of a new action brings new strength.
• I don't think anything is unrealistic if you believe you can do it.
• Don't let life discourage you; everyone who got where he is had to begin where he was.
• Children will not remember you for the material things you provided but for the feeling that you cherished them.

PS - I am not endorsing nor opposing Mormons or any other religion, sect or nationality.

Surrendering to the Now

Great read from a person/therapist/counsellor Ari Kiev:

"Surrendering to the now turns off the incessant mental activity that projects negative images onto events. This reduces misinterpretation, distraction, and anxiety about future events and guilt over past events and creates a sense of calm. Surrender leads to an expansion of consciousness and increased control over you automatic nervous system, which enables you to stretch your performance in any activity beyond conventional limits. This leads to a state of "active passivity" whereby increased awareness, understanding, and tolerance allow you to control psychological processes."

This reading/passage is very comforting to me. I surrender is a powerful concept that allows me to be in the moment and helps me refrain from labeling and judging things and people and events.

Peace today is all I want and desire.

Thank you Ari Kiev

Maturity

A great reading the other day. It came from a free Al-Anon pamphlet. The discussion leader read the 16 things behind maturity.

The next week, different meeting, and I swear, I don't recall seeing this person at the previous meeting, held the same exact discussion. He copied the pamphlet and left it in the center of the room. Which of course is the Al-Anon way of saying, "You don't have to pick it up and read it." Of course this another way of not trying to exert ones behavior or opinion on another.

And of course we all jumped up and grabbed a copy.

But this morning I am writing about "maturity" too.

I read a "non conference approved book" this morning. But there are many things I now read that relates to Al-Anon.

Here is the quote:

"Maturity lies in accepting reality, not in demanding perfection. You are not perfect. Your life is not perfect. No day is perfect."

There is solace in knowing this. Whatever the hell "solace" means. Who says "solace" by the way? A blogger without a large vocabulary. Ahhhhh, sarcasm, used against the self - a false modesty and humbleness.

In the past couple of days, I realized I am getting hooked again. My immaturity and seeking certain outcomes - sometimes by forcing solutions and attaching my self-worth to the outcome is getting me into a little trouble. I am "fighting" by arguing. I love a good debate. I seek it out in many ways. I can cut through a person's words and sentences and even the sentence structure (even though I suck at English grammar) just to "win." But it only occurs when someone "attacks me."

What are people doing when people attack me?

I am renting a nice 4 or depending who you ask - a 5 bedroom house. My "other" house is paid off and that is where my Whenever to be ex lives. It is expensive and well -worth a lot of money - AND paid off. I am a saver of money. Spend thrift. Well, I got trigger because my landlord - to whom I pay A LOT of mullah to (that's money in English slang), stated in a friggin' email that I was not "allowing Realtors to 'show' the house. and that I should Section 3 of the contract."

Well, dear Joseph, my ugly side, read Section 3. I am not an attorney, but I stayed at a Holiday Inn Express once, shot back reread Section 3 and pointed out certain words and phrases like "appropriate times" and "consideration" and etc. And I shoved that across the Internet cable like a grenade going up their you know what.

I was triggered. I felt "how dare they?" I have more money that them. I busted my ass all my life and now I am stuck in a rented home having them tell me that realtors can come anytime they want to (some want to come at 6PM at night while I am eating dinner or changing clothes and I said "No." I would have said, Okay before and sacrificed myself and well-being and my needs for people I don't even know. But now, with Al-Anon programming, I am a worthwhile person and I COME FIRST so don't fuck with me. Okay Al-Anon does not say "don't fuck with me." But I am worthy. And I do come first. So now I say "No" without much guilt. Whereas before, guilt would leap around for several hours in my brain on a trampoline.

So, they are pissed I am making the realtor work around my schedule. Well, tough. I read Section 3. And .....

Isn't life grand? Life gives me all sorts of tests. Major and minor to test my maturity. Life equals reality. Al-Anon teaches me to experience reality and be mature. Also to act mature. And realize I am not perfect and that's okay.